There is an odor at our house.
Mom: Are you stinky?
Child: No. Just poopy.
Crying child comes running to her mom.
Parent asks non-crying child: Did you hit her?
Non-crying child: No. She was an alligator, so I whacked her.
"Dear Heavenly Father, I wish to have a good time. Please bless us to have a good family home evening next time...." (It didn't include dessert tonight)