I woke up this morning thinking, "Hooray! It's a short week. We have friends to visit this morning. Ryan doesn't have any evening meetings. It should be a fairly easy two days!"
And then the twins got up.
Reality set in.
I didn't think that there was a wrong side of a crib to wake up on, but they found it. Or someone switched out my Sometimes Moderately Evil Twins for Truly Evil Twins. Or the Terrible Twos officially started today.
Any one of those scenarios doesn't quite do justice to my morning.
8:10 Crying because Emma is gone.
8:16 Twins reached the left-over cereal still in bowls on the counter and dumped it on the floor.
8:17 Note to self- remind Emma and Elizabeth to put their bowls farther back on the counter when they clear their dishes.
8:18 Clean floor.
8:20 Hear toys being dumped from their containers onto the living room floor. All of them.
8:25 Sit down to read a chapter of my book with breakfast.
8:27 Annie climbs on the chair next to me to try to eat some of my breakfast.
8:31 Twins empty their dresser drawers.
8:34 Clean up the clothes.
8:42 Twins dump all the books off the shelves.
8:45 Find the book that is missing a page.
8:46 Pick up books.
8:48 Show twins the snow outside through the window. Twins keep saying, "Uh oh. Yucky."
8:50 Put music in the dvd player to listen to. Since the cd player has been added to the list of appliances broken by the twins.
8:51 Twins turn off the tv, which turns off the dvd player.
8:52 Try to turn music back on.
8:53 Twins turn off the tv. Mommy gives very stern "no."
8:54 Try to turn music back on.
8:55 Twins turn off the tv again. Mommy gives up.
9:03 Get twins dressed.
9:11 Annie has taken off her pants.
9:17 Maddie has taken off her pants as well.
9:18 Contemplates duct tape as a viable clothing option.
9:26 Get myself dressed.
9:27 Hear chair being dragged across the kitchen floor.
9:31 Apply deodorant. Plug in hair straightener.
9:33 Find Annie pulling off all the magnets and papers off the fridge.
9:34 Return to the bathroom to discover Maddie has turned the faucet on and there is standing water in the sink. With the straightener in the sink. (!!!!!!)
9:34 1/2 Unplug straightener, which is making odd noises.
9:35 Contemplate duct tape as a restraining device.
9:36 Text Ryan, telling him I'm having a rough morning. Just needing to vent a little.
9:40 Hear phone.... dialing?
9:40 1/2 Find chair once again against the counter, Maddie sitting on our laptop, dialing our land-line phone.
9:41 Annie found a bottle of non-smelly lotion (coughRYAN'Scough) and is squirting it on the floor.
9:52 Back in the bathroom to brush my hair and put on some make-up.
9:55 "Crash" from the living room. TV now on the floor.
9:56 Both twins crying in their cribs.
9:57 Text Ryan a picture of the TV on the floor.
9:59 "Wow" from Ryan.
10:06 Find Annie with leg over the railing of her crib.
10:09 Can't find the twins' gosh-darn pants again.
10:12 Annie gets her sandals to wear. Mommy says no. Annie cries.
10:16 Both twins wearing pants and socks again.
10:21 Shoes and coats on.
10:24 Turn on the car, with heaters full blast. Put Annie in her seat.
10:25 Maddie touches the snow and cries.
10:26 Annie screaming for her binky.
10:31 Grab friend's pie plate to return and get into the car myself. Already late.
Annie and Maddie's mood improved about 15 minutes later, and mine followed shortly thereafter. A sympathetic ear is very helpful.